Hell is Full: Horror Never Dies – A Zombie Podcast | Episode Five ~ Script

by Zombie Master

-Show Script HND: Ep 05-

 

{Intro}

Leaving your -Necropolis- you search for the -Thriller- only to find that -The Dead Don’t Die- as Zombie Master Reviews The Walking Dead Season One Episode Five – Wildfire

 

{Scene One}

Hell is Full, an back from the Grave is… Zombie Master, an today I will be reviewing The Walking Dead Episode: Wildfire
We start out with Rick dripping sweat, covered in blood and zombie goo baking in the hot Georgia sun, and instead of maybe cleaning himself off what is he DOING? Talking… to… the… wind… Oh! I mean to Morgan on the radio warning him about Atlanta.

Soon after we switch to the aftermath of the food fight that happened the night before, and come up to Andrea still sitting over her sister’s body and Lori tries to act like a decent human being for once… but it really does not suit her, then Rick goes to try and make Andrea listen and is given a good lesson of why he needs to quit teaching people about the gun safety.

Return of the Credits! *Hum imperial death march*

{Scene Two}
After the credit roll once more, we see Daryl being his kind and fluffy self and Lori is compassionate for once… of course it is when it is kind of dumb to be. Jacqui who you may remember from episode two which is the last time she even had a line… as far as I can remember let’s everyone know that Jim was bit… and we almost have a good old fashion lynching. Dale agrees with Daryl and everyone starts talking about going to the CDC because Dale must be sick to do that… or something that affect. Annnnn then comes one of Rick’s most famous STUPID lines. “We don’t kill the living” While threatening to kill Daryl, not for the first time since he’s met him. Daryl succinctly points out this incongruency. An we all know, Rick will DEFINITELY regret this line later.

Moving on we see Carol having some therapeutic couples counseling with Ed, just as quickly we switch over to Amy starting to twitch annnd we learn that the undead do indeed breath in this universe. Andrea tries to have a heart to heart talk with Amy, but Amy only wants to talk after lunch. Andrea will not hear of it, and cleans the slate with Amy.

-Snow White’s Poison Bite Promo-
{Scene Three}
Going back to Jim we see him having the “Zombie Hot Flashes” which we will see again later in the series, shortly thereafter we go to Rick talking to Jim, annnnd Rick needing to realize that in a dead world, life is not about what people want, it is about what they need and have to do… Jim says as much. After which, we get a moving scene… of Jim vomiting then Rick walks outside and we have another classic “let’s act as uncomfortable as possible around each other, that way he’ll never know we soooo did it!” moment with Shane and Lori acting like children.

Cutting away we go to Shane and Rick taking a stroll in the wood, Shane takes a hard look at Rick, and thinks of changing… Rick’s mind. After realizing that he is not that much of an insane douche nugget because of Lori YET, Dale walks up and after Shane quickly makes a poor excuse we cut to the next scene. But, before we go on… I have to say for anyone who has read the comics… this moment was SUCH a TEASE! Anyway… Moving on…


{Scene Four}

Shane tells the party that he trust Rick on going to the CDC to cover his tracks and then we get Rick talking to static again, afterward we get the entire camp talking about who is and isn’t going to the CDC and Miguel makes the best decision anyone could… he breaks away from the Bataan Death March that is Rick’s Leadership. Shortly after we see the cavalcade of the damned filing out to poignant music and we have the camera pan to everyone including Merle’s bike that Daryl is bringing with him… Honestly… I would bring the bike too, less gas.
After our glorious montage, I mean as soon as the music is DONE, the RV brakes down… Conveniently just at the right time for Jim to ask to see how the other half lives, wanting to be left behind so he can become a walker and be with his family in zombie Shangri-la. Rick gets sad faced annnd talks to the group about Jim’s decision annnd Shane is oddly compassionate. Everyone says goodbye to him… annnnd with Daryl giving him a head nod, they move on leaving Jim to look for tasty treats.
-www.BlackFlag.tv Promo-
{Scene Five}

Noooooowwww… In pops Jenner! In a good old fashioned “Buzz, Buzz, Wobbly, Wobbly” camera transmission… ooh! Look! It’s named Wildfire! The name of the episode! how clever… (deadpan). So, after we learn it’s been sixty three days since the disease went global he goes on for a bit then we see him doing “sciencey things” til he knocks some acid over on “TS-19” and Roooom Gooooo Boooom. He seems a little upset afterward when see him getting drunk, cussing at the camera, annnd talking about suicide.

 

{Scene Six}

Jumping back to our merry travelers parking and getting out in front of the CDC with bodies everywhere and the distinct… buzzing… of flies… nothing wrong here… Everyone starts looking a little disconcerted walking through the field of rotting corpses, and their told to quiet their coughing on the FUMES of the DEAD… as they might attract something… liiike the undead…
Ok… sometimes there’s suspension of disbelief… and sometimes there is just ridiculous to the point of laughter. Everyone is walking through what looks to be a ROTTING BATTLEFIELD with flies so thick they could be a WALL, FUMES so bad they are having troubles breathing an yet NO ONE thinks to QUESTION Rick’s decision… NO ONE makes ANY indication that they think that they should even TURN BACK and get the FUNK out the FUNK.
They find even though they’re the party that’s knocking… they can’t come in, and Daryl is the one to have sense an say that they should get out of there, and the rest of the party starts to fall apart knowing that the freaks come out at night. Rick loses his FIGGING mind, acting even more stupid than usual… and Shane starts to take charge like he should’ve in the first place trying to get everyone out of there. However, Jenner opens “the lights to heaven” because Rick lost it in front of his camera and the party is engulfed by the magic white light. Don’t Walk into the LIGHT!

 

{Final Thoughts}

Looking back on it… this episode is ok. It does not have anything terribly exciting happen. It doesn’t even have anything that’s all that interesting happen. It’s one of those episodes of a show that feels like it is just there to connect the episode before it and the episode after it. Its bridge episode, if you will, you have to walk across it to get to the other side, but otherwise it has no real use in the series beyond that. Jim dies but we didn’t really know him, they leave camp buuut that was obviously going to happen. We meet Jenner but all of his stuff could have been condensed to about two minutes at the beginning of the next episode. Any series that has ongoing story lines will have bridge episodes. Some are done better than others so that they don’t feel like they are what they are; this one… is just blatant about what it is. It’s not bad, but nothing great either.
Annnnd Fade to White!

 

{Outro}

Always look for fresh food, never go out alone, do not get bit, and remember Horror NEVER Dies…
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